Three men who were lost in the forest were captured by
cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could
live if they pass a trial. The first step of the trial was to go
to the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So
all three men went separate ways to gather fruits.
The [...]
A nun is sitting with her Mother Superior chatting. “I used some horrible language this week and feel absolutely terrible about it.”
“When did you use this awful language?” asks the elder nun.
“Well, I was golfing and hit an incredible drive that looked like it was going to go over 280 yards, but it struck a [...]
Things Mom Would Never Say
“How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?”
“Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too”
“Just leave all the lights on … it makes the house look more cheery”
“Let me smell that shirt — Yeah, it’s good for another week”
“Go ahead and keep [...]
One night, a police officer was stalking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of the driving-under-the-influence laws.
At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. Then, sat in the front seat fumbling around with [...]
A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory exploration. With their eyes closed, they would feel objects from pumice stones to pine cones and smell aromatic herbs and exotic fruits.
One day, the teacher brought in a great variety of lifesavers, more flavors than you could ever imagine. [...]
We’ve all heard the phrase: ” You learn something new everyday” Well, here’s today’s lesson: Think before you speak! This actually happened at Harvard University in October last year. In a biology class, the professor was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen. A female freshman raised her hand and asked, “If I understand, [...]
These three nuns die and go to heaven. They are greeted at the pearly gates by St. Peter, who tells them, “Ladies, because you have given such valuable service to God while on earth, he is granting you each one wish. You can go back to earth for one day as anyone you choose to [...]
After numerous rounds of “We don’t even know if Osama is still alive,” Osama himself decided to send George W. Bush a letter in his own handwriting to let the President know he was still in the game.
Bush opened the letter and it appeared to contain a single line of coded message:
370HSSV-0773H
Bush was baffled, so [...]
A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense: “My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offense committed by his limb.” “Well put,” the judge [...]
A blonde decides to do something wild she hasn’t done before,
so she sets out to rent her first X-rated adult video. She goes
to the video store and, after looking around for a while,
selects a title that sounds very stimulating.
She drives home, lights some candles, slips into something
comfortable, and puts the tape in the VCR. To [...]